Planning Your Own Life doesn't...

I just sitting down in my office, feeling a bit not well coz of the unknown weather that wearing me down and talk about life with my BF. A thought hit me, Planning your own life doesn't always mean it will go as you plan it to be. How many of us ever plan something in our life, yet in the end we don't achieve it or worse, we abandoning our plan in the middle of it in order to get through with another plan? I'll bet that most.. or should I say, all of us is like that.

Life always shows us things that can distract us from the path of destiny (I'm just toning this words down so it won't seem that I'm preaching). While perhaps we can do one thing we're best at, most of the times we're just want to.... push ourself to another direction, just to know our own extent (limit). And that always confuse us in the end of what we're best to do, because of conflict of interest (not with other people but because of ourself).

I'm trying to look back of why we're like this.... Why I'm like this, a jack-of all-trade type of person, don't exactly know what I like to do, and what's the cause of it. And I stumble upon many... many answers. Envy, Curiosity (they always said 'curiosity kills the cat'. I guess it's true enough in this case), Habit, and... Environment Demand. I won't say that there's only these traits that makes someone do what they're doing. I believe that there are lots of other causes, but for now I just write these traits.

1. Envy

When you say you adore someone because of their special trait, I would say that it's actually envy because you can't do what they're doing. But it will be a down-side when you're actually try to do what they're good at and copying. That's just pathetic. Well, I sorta did that when I'm still a kid (see for yourself whether you're doing it too, and you'll be surprised that all of us actually did that). A child is always jealous about things that they see other kid's been praised at. They will always try to beat those kids in order to gain attention for themselves. Why? I just haven't got time to think thoroughly about it, but I will write about it when I got the answer. Back to the topic, when we envy someone and that become a jealousy, we're making ourselves moves from the path we're supposed to go in our life that's predestined for us only by doing things we're not supposed to do. Why the extra baggage? Well, that's my point and I'm just trying to make things simple.

2. Curiosity

There is a famous proverb for that, "curiosity kills the cat". These proverb can be used in our own life as often as it can be. Why? Curiosity can kill our chance to do something we're meant to do, just because of the heat of moment or passion. We love to try new things just because we're interested on what other people said about it, or should we just say, curious (i'd go for peculiar but I guess it's just too advance word for this simple writing)? Curiosity lead me to learn tons of things. Painting, outbound, knitting, cross-stitching, puzzling, biking, and still lots of other things I can do. My problem is that I'm doing it the best way while playing around with it, and get the best result. But when I know it hold only that, I lost interest with it because it doesn't hold the same 'magic' when you learn about it. Perhaps because I learn the trick to do all of the things easily, and never get any difficulties during learning it, so it's just an easy pie for me. As for other people? Well... perhaps they'll hold grudge with me if they know what I'm capable of and my result when they compete with me. I'm not bragging here.. but who give a damn?

3. Habit

Hmm... What should I say about this? Well, habit is... as it is. As we go to school, we learn things that are different than our own interest, which muddled up our potential. But when we meet the right button to push, our ability will be getting it's own boost. It's a bit hard to say it clearly about this one peculiar point. Habit is what makes us now, whether we like it or not. A wrong footing we might get, a wrong education might ruin someone's life, but we got to move on with it as it is.

4. Demand

The point already saying it out loud. We're doing things because of the demand. And why? Perhaps another time I will have a say about this.

Enough saying for today. I never though that my ramble would actually take me to write this much. TTYL.

Love~

Shin